Nehebkau Hatshepsut

Personality: Nehebkau is a true idealists, always looking for the hint of good in even the worst of people and events, searching for ways to make things better. While he may be perceived as calm, reserved, or even shy, Nehebkau has an inner flame and passion that can shine brightly and sometimes burn him. The risk of feeling misunderstood is unfortunately high for Nehebka, but when he finds like-minded people to spend his time with, the harmony he feels becomes a fountain of joy and inspiration. Nehebkau is guided by their principles, rather than by logic, excitement, or practicality. When deciding how to move forward, he will look to honor, beauty, morality and virtue. He is led by the purity of his own intent, not rewards and punishments. He is idealistic, open-minded, flexible, creative, passionate, dedicated, hard-working and seeker of value and harmony. However, Nehebkau can be blinded by his ideas and altruism. He can also become temperamental and impractical when he is put to a task he doesn't enjoy. Really, if someone is looking for a loyal friend to party with they should call upon Nehebkau but if its something like taking inventory, they would have better luck talking to a dog.

Likes:

• Quiet - Nehebkau's favorite time of day is at the crack of dawn. Its time where the parties have ended and everyone is asleep. This is when he does his best work because the world seems to be at peace. 
  
• Books - Nehebkau found his solace from all his trainers and tutors in books. Books could help him escape into a different world or even the magnificence of his own world. 
  
• Trade - Its part of his heritage and he bleeds it. Trade means everything to him. Its not only his way of life but also how he connects to world and thrives. 
  

Dislikes:

• Disorganization - Part of Nehebkau's success lies in his ability to prioritize and organize his work through out Heliohapt. He keeps thorough records of everything transaction no matter how small and keeps them all under careful protection with only two people able to access them. One of them is himself.
  
• Lying - Nehebkau doesnt lie. There is no gain in lying and only leads to distress, disorganization and a decrease in profit. Even it hurts people, Nehebkau will be brutally honest. 
  
• Humidity - Being born in Heliohapt, Nehebkau has become accustomed to dry heats and cold nights. However there have been a few times when he experienced the devils swampy ass, or humidity and he felt like dying.
  

Aspirations:
Nehebkau has only two aspirations in this life. His dream and his responsibility. The first being his responsibility. Nehebkau wants to return from his journey around the world having the means to expand his families trade routes and push higher towards the throne of Heliohapt. Second and lastly, to conquer a dungeon. Ever since he was a kid, he always wanted to conquer a dungeon. The stories, treasures, magical items and the djinn. The countless things he could do with the dungeon made many nights restless.

Phobias/fears: 
Nehebkau has a vey common fear. The death of his family and the worry it bring him every so often in his thoughts scares him. It makes him even more scared since he has set out into the world on his own journey. One day he might return home and find out his father has died or his mother or the slave girl her freed. Its these thoughts that keep him up at night.

Face-Claim: Aijima Cecil
Hair Color: Dark Brown
Eye Color: Indigo
Height: 5'11ft (180.34cm)
Weight: 162lbs (73.5kg)
Appearance: Nehebkau was a pure born of Heliohapt, evident by his gem like eyes and his skin a caramel shade. However he doesnt seem to hold the same white hair as someone of the members of the Royal Court. Its one of his discerning features that mix well with his indigo eyes. He stands at an average height but is adorned with a body of delicately sculpted marble. He wears clothing is custom to his families seamstress's design. The end result of all her work captivates all that gaze upon him; The white silk clothing dyed blue and embroidered with gold thread trimming, along with the gold jewelry draping over his body exudes to the fact that he comes from a rich background.

Rukh Alignment:White Rukh
Special Features:---

History:
Nehebkau was born into a merchant family of the Heliohapt kingdom. The family weren't so high as to become a noble family, but they were comfortable with their wealth and thats what mattered. Nehebkau was a single child from a merchant family. His father and mother both were merchants. His father was running his own trade company that he started from the ground up and his mother was the sole heir to a shipping company. They were a wealthy family and lived very comfortably. They treated Nehebkau the same way; always giving them the best they could: the best tutors, the best books, the best trainers, food, clothes, slaves etc. They spoiled there child but  they definitely made him work through the spoils.

Nehebkau from the time he could say a word till he could sit down with adults twice his age and be comfortable was spoiled through training, literature, food, wine, trade and much much more. By the time he was thirteen, Nehebkau was help running the family company. It wasn't a big portion of the company, but enough to get more than his feet wet. Thanks to his parent care of him, Nehebkau was swimming in no time and working his way towards fame of trade just like his parents.
 
His earnings in trade led him to expand on the business within the country itself and establish a repertoire with the local merchants. He bought himself some slaves and after purchase freed them. He promised them work and lodging if they continued on with him. Out of the three he freed, only one stayed to work in Heliohapt. The others left to go find their families. The one thats stayed was a woman.

A brilliant woman that became his assistant and that Nehebkau decided to invest into. Nehebkau hired people to help train her in book keeping, trade and some combat. However, it was mostly for self-defense and security that if caught alone she wouldn't become a slave once again. She soon became an invaluable asset to his growth in Heliohapt.

Little to Nehebkau's knowledge was that one of the high priest of Heliohapt didn't take kindly to Nehebkau's growth near their temple. Now Heliohapt a free range market with special interests in Slavery and Medicinal exchange, but if a priest were to lose followers or public interest due to some teenager from merchant family, then it wouldn't set well with them. One night, this priest decided to act against Nehebkau. They sent a group of assassin to break in and eliminate Nehebkau. However what they found was nothing more than guards of Hatshepsut waiting on them. They were captured and brought to justice along with the family that sent them.

The Royal Family set out an investigation that over the next few years would investigate the affairs of the noble family that sent out the assassins. This investigation would turn up damning evidence against the high priest and their legacy leading to many more arrests and a few other low level priests families in the same conspiracies. Eventually the investigation would end and the Royal family would deliberate on their next move.

Nehebkau would be part of these discussions in the Royal Family and the dynasty of merchants known as the Hatshepsuts. They have been around for a couple hundred years and have recently expanded through marriage. Now they have have a son who caught a High priests corruption and attempt at assassination. This was someone who could become a good public figure in the future.

Its be three years since the attack on Hatshepsut's. The Royal Family made them an offer to high trade priorities and the family accepted. Nehebkau's mother, the original face of the Hatshepsut's took her position as the public figure of the family. This left Nehebkau's father to take up the family business from behind the scenes. Nehebkau had his own path and had set out to find it.

Role-Play Sample:
Nehebkau walks through the market, alone, wondering what sort of weapon he should buy. Its been years since he found anything exotic enough to quench his thirst. Its always the same home smithed crap. He desired something more. Something like....like that! There it was, a beautiful kirpan. The hilt decorate with gems. The blade trimmed with a gold that flowed fluently through the entirety of its beauty. It was defiantly a blade for royalty. Yurei pulled out his gold pooch and was ready to buy when a beautiful, busty, deliciously, juicy fruit cart. He rushes over to it and hands over the gold so he can have the cart. He walks towards the slums and starts handing out food for those who need it. He gives away the cart and sticks around for a dinner offer of bread and mush.

Not sure if this character is supposed to be finished or not, because it hasn't been bumped, but I'll give a few things real quick that will need to be done in order for it to be finished:

Personality needs to be 200 words.

Each like and dislike should have at least 1 sentence explaining why they like/dislike it.

Aspirations and Phobias/fears need to each be 75 words in length describing things like why it's their aspiration/phobia/fear, when they obtained it, what they're doing about it etc. (whatever fleshes the character's motivations out further).

Appearance needs to be 100 words in length (you have 82, so you're close)


Everything else looks great. Your history is well done, easy to read and makes sense.

When you finish making those edits, simply post in here saying 'bump' to let staff know its ready ^_^. Otherwise we would never know it was completed XD.

I think I finished everything you wanted me to do.

little confused by this "Like"

Peace & Quiet - Yurei was bored in a calm environment and has become accustomed to everything be relaxing.

If he is bored with a calm environment, why would he like it?

For phobias, what exactly IS his phobia? Is it of being alone? If so, could you make that slightly more clear, please?

Height and Weight need to be in metric, please.

Everything else looks fabulous ^_^

Fixed, and pokie poke

Approved ^_^ I will get your vault set up shortly.

Code:


[center][b][img]https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/1f/7d/ab/1f7dabe172750cec72c53680aafbc3e6.jpg[/img][/b]

[left][b]Name: [/b]Yurei Rannsurotto[/left]
[b]Country Affiliation: [/b]Heliohapt
[b]Race: [/b]Human
[b]Tier: [/b]D
[b]Specialization: [/b]Strength
[b]Age + Birthdate: [/b]20, February 14th 
[b]Gender: [/b]Male
[b]Sexuality: [/b]Bisexual
[b]Personality: [/b]Yurei is a great analyst, creative, enthusiastic, open-minded, and holds dear, a blunt honesty. He excels in analyzing connections, seeing how seemingly unrelated factors tie in with each other in ways that bewilder most other people. He sees the world from a different perspective, alway adapting and changing with it. He is always looking for a way to leave his mark even if he is rather withdrawn. Yurei is very private, insensitive, can be loose-minded, condescending towards authority and is one who demands respect to give it out.

First impressions are everything to him. If someone were make a bad one at first, it might take years for him to change his impression of you. Though if someone does seem to break down his countless barriers and endless trust issues, they would find a sad boy alone in this world. He just need someone to hug and someone to help out in this big scary world. Yes, behind the facade that is Yurei lies a scared child in need for a new family. He needs to feel wanted and loved again. After getting that hug he so desperately needs, the chances of him ever leaving your side is slim to none.
[b]Likes:[/b]
[list]
[*]Peace & Quiet - Yurei was born in a calm environment and has become accustomed to everything be relaxing. 
[*]Books - Yurei grew up reading scrolls, parchments and books from around the world. He has taking a liking to reading.
[*]Food - Over the years of living in nobility, he has developed a discernible palette that only lets him stomach the best of foods.
[/list]
[b]Dislikes:[/b]
[list]
[*]Chaos - He hates when his calm living environment gets ruined.
[*]Loud Noises - Why would anyone like loud noises?
[*]Bad Food - Any food that doesnt meet his palette, he can't stomach, and he will regurgitate. 
[*]Humidity - He doesnt like to sweat in a wet heat. 
[/list]
[b]Aspirations:[/b]
Yurei has only two aspirations in this life. His dream and his responsibility. The first being his responsibility, to honor her memory. He does everything in her name, doing good through out all of the Heliohapt kingdom to help people in need and honor her. Second and lastly, to conquer a dungeon. Ever since he was a kid, he always wanted to conquer a dungeon. It seemed so badass to say, "Yea, I climbed that dungeon and took its prize." He would use that prize to honor her memory and maybe make himself happy for once. You know, a little "Treat Yoself!" 
[b]Phobias/fears: [/b]
After her death and the death of his parents, Yurei found himself alone on a daily basis. He refused drink, to smoke, to drown his pain. He knew she wouldnt want him to do those things so he didn't. He let the pain wash over him and the depression hit him like a brick wall. He fears the bitter resentment he feels towards those that hurt has family. He fears it will overpower him and leave despair in his heart. He fears that loneliness and strives to bury that pain with helping others.
[b]Face-Claim: [/b]Aijima Cecil
[b]Hair Color: [/b]Dark Brown
[b]Eye Color: [/b]Indigo
[b]Height: [/b]5'11ft (180.34cm)
[b]Weight: [/b]162lbs (73.5kg)
[b]Appearance: [/b]

[left]Yurei was a pure born of Heliohapt, evident by his dark hair and his skin a caramel shade. His eyes seem to glow unlike those of Heliohapt. Its one of his discerning features. The indigo eyes that seem to flow like the sea. He stands at an average height but is decorate with a body of sculpted marble. His clothing is custom to his seamstress's design to captivate all that gaze on him. The white silk clothing with the blue dye and gold thread trimming. The gold jewelry draping over his body to highlight his marbled features. He obvious high caste. [/left]
[/center]
[b]Special Traits: [/b]N/A
[b]History:[/b]
Yurei was born into the higher caste of the Heliohapt kingdom. He was raised in a happy family as a single child. His father and mother both were merchants. His father was running his own trade that he started from the ground up and his mother was the sole heir to a shipping company. They were a rich family and very busy so they treated Yurei as if he was royalty. They gave him the best food, the best reading materials, the best training and accidentally the love of his life. 

It was a young fanalis slave girl. She was a shy one and very quiet. She was suppose to be Yurei's mother's hand maiden but what they didnt know when they bought her was that she was blind. Yurei was enthralled by the young fanalis instantly. He loved her crimson blood hair, her soft tender smile and they way she spoke to him.

Yurei was captivated by her. He spend his teenage years  with her laughing, dancing, and just being genuinely happy. Over the years, the girl became a woman and one of the family. As Yurei became a man, the two grew inseparable. Yurei was engaged to her, that was until she was killed by a group of assassins.

One night, a mysterious group of assassin broke into the Ransurorro manor with the intention to kill the entire family, but the fanalis girl defended Yurei till her last breath. Everyone was lost in this nightmare. Yurei was left alone with his family's company and inheritance.

He made three major decisions after this night. The first was that he brought the families company together and anointed his families friends to run it. He would hold the controlling portion, and to keep the company in his control, he would give them big cuts of the cash. The second would be to let slaves live and run the house in his absence, which is the last part.

Yurei Ransurotto would set out into the world looking and searching with the money of his company and inheritance to find those that destroyed his life. Though some would want to take vengeance, Yurei would honor her memory by forgive those who killed her. His goal is to honor her memory and get powerful so those who come to hurt him will pay for there trepidation. 

[b]Role-Play Sample:[/b]
Yurei walks through the market, alone, wondering what sort of weapon he should buy. Its been years since he found anything exotic enough to quench his thirst. Its always the same home smithed crap. He desired something more. Something like....like that! There it was, a beautiful kukri. The hilt decorate with gems. The blade trimmed with a gold that flowed fluently through the entirety of its beauty. It was defiantly a blade for royalty. Yurei pulled out his gold pooch and was ready to buy when a beautiful, busty, deliciously, juicy fruit cart. He rushes over to it and hands over the gold so he can have the cart. He walks towards the slums and starts handing out food for those who need it. He gives away the cart and sticks around for a dinner offer of bread and mush.

Unfortunately, your history doesn't make sense within the context of Heliohapt.

Heliohapt does not have noble families on the site. The Pharaoh's bloodline is considered "Royal" but it is the High priests who hold political power like "nobles" would in other countries. The hierarchy is basically royalty, high priests, priests, slaves of royalty, citizens/merchants, then slaves at the bottom of the totem pole.

Please change the wordings around and restructure your history to reflect Heliohapt's culture and setting. Aside from that nitpick though, this app is more or less ready to be approved. Please post a bump here when you've made the edits. Apologies for the inconvenience.

I edited. 

Sorry about the mix up. I thought this followed the manga. That was my bad.

Sadly the canon of the forum's Heliohapt was established before the manga really revealed much about the country v.v

Anyways, there is still a mention of nobility in the post but it's fine. Approved!

Code:

[center][img]http://i1342.photobucket.com/albums/o761/mrjmoore14/3ca10e2e-4c6c-4a51-baea-c82ffb125d50_zpszcltwmyb.jpg[/img][/center]

[center][b][size=18][u] Nehebka [/u][u]Hatshepsut [/u][/size][/b][/center]
[center]
[b]Country Affiliation:[/b] Heliohapt
[b]Race:[/b] Human
[b]Tier:[/b] D
[b]Class:[/b] Warrior
[b]Age + Birthdate:[/b] 18 | February 20th
[b]Gender:[/b] Male
[b]Sexuality:[/b] Bisexual[/center]

[b]Personality:[/b] Nehebkau is a true idealists, always looking for the hint of good in even the worst of people and events, searching for ways to make things better. While he may be perceived as calm, reserved, or even shy, Nehebkau has an inner flame and passion that can shine brightly and sometimes burn him. The risk of feeling misunderstood is unfortunately high for Nehebka, but when he finds like-minded people to spend his time with, the harmony he feels becomes a fountain of joy and inspiration. Nehebkau is guided by their principles, rather than by logic, excitement, or practicality. When deciding how to move forward, he will look to honor, beauty, morality and virtue. He is led by the purity of his own intent, not rewards and punishments. He is idealistic, open-minded, flexible, creative, passionate, dedicated, hard-working and seeker of value and harmony. However, Nehebkau can be blinded by his ideas and altruism. He can also become temperamental and impractical when he is put to a task he doesn't enjoy. Really, if someone is looking for a loyal friend to party with they should call upon Nehebkau but if its something like taking inventory, they would have better luck talking to a dog.

[b]Likes:[/b]
[list]
[*]Quiet - Nehebkau's favorite time of day is at the crack of dawn. Its time where the parties have ended and everyone is asleep. This is when he does his best work because the world seems to be at peace. 
[*]Books - Nehebkau found his solace from all his trainers and tutors in books. Books could help him escape into a different world or even the magnificence of his own world. 
[*]Trade - Its part of his heritage and he bleeds it. Trade means everything to him. Its not only his way of life but also how he connects to world and thrives. 
[/list]

[b]Dislikes:[/b]
[list]
[*]Disorganization - Part of Nehebkau's success lies in his ability to prioritize and organize his work through out Heliohapt. He keeps thorough records of everything transaction no matter how small and keeps them all under careful protection with only two people able to access them. One of them is himself.
[*]Lying - Nehebkau doesnt lie. There is no gain in lying and only leads to distress, disorganization and a decrease in profit. Even it hurts people, Nehebkau will be brutally honest. 
[*]Humidity - Being born in Heliohapt, Nehebkau has become accustomed to dry heats and cold nights. However there have been a few times when he experienced the devils swampy ass, or humidity and he felt like dying.
[/list]

[b]Aspirations:[/b]
Nehebkau has only two aspirations in this life. His dream and his responsibility. The first being his responsibility. Nehebkau wants to return from his journey around the world having the means to expand his families trade routes and push higher towards the throne of Heliohapt. Second and lastly, to conquer a dungeon. Ever since he was a kid, he always wanted to conquer a dungeon. The stories, treasures, magical items and the djinn. The countless things he could do with the dungeon made many nights restless.

[b]Phobias/fears: [/b]
Nehebkau has a vey common fear. The death of his family and the worry it bring him every so often in his thoughts scares him. It makes him even more scared since he has set out into the world on his own journey. One day he might return home and find out his father has died or his mother or the slave girl her freed. Its these thoughts that keep him up at night.

[b]Face-Claim: [/b]Aijima Cecil
[b]Hair Color: [/b]Dark Brown
[b]Eye Color: [/b]Indigo
[b]Height: [/b]5'11ft (180.34cm)
[b]Weight: [/b]162lbs (73.5kg)
[b]Appearance: [/b]Nehebkau was a pure born of Heliohapt, evident by his gem like eyes and his skin a caramel shade. However he doesnt seem to hold the same white hair as someone of the members of the Royal Court. Its one of his discerning features that mix well with his indigo eyes. He stands at an average height but is adorned with a body of delicately sculpted marble. He wears clothing is custom to his families seamstress's design. The end result of all her work captivates all that gaze upon him; The white silk clothing dyed blue and embroidered with gold thread trimming, along with the gold jewelry draping over his body exudes to the fact that he comes from a rich background.

[b]Rukh Alignment:[/b]White Rukh
[b]Special Features:[/b]---

[b]History:[/b]
Nehebkau was born into a merchant family of the Heliohapt kingdom. The family weren't so high as to become a noble family, but they were comfortable with their wealth and thats what mattered. Nehebkau was a single child from a merchant family. His father and mother both were merchants. His father was running his own trade company that he started from the ground up and his mother was the sole heir to a shipping company. They were a wealthy family and lived very comfortably. They treated Nehebkau the same way; always giving them the best they could: the best tutors, the best books, the best trainers, food, clothes, slaves etc. They spoiled there child but  they definitely made him work through the spoils.

Nehebkau from the time he could say a word till he could sit down with adults twice his age and be comfortable was spoiled through training, literature, food, wine, trade and much much more. By the time he was thirteen, Nehebkau was help running the family company. It wasn't a big portion of the company, but enough to get more than his feet wet. Thanks to his parent care of him, Nehebkau was swimming in no time and working his way towards fame of trade just like his parents.
 
His earnings in trade led him to expand on the business within the country itself and establish a repertoire with the local merchants. He bought himself some slaves and after purchase freed them. He promised them work and lodging if they continued on with him. Out of the three he freed, only one stayed to work in Heliohapt. The others left to go find their families. The one thats stayed was a woman.

A brilliant woman that became his assistant and that Nehebkau decided to invest into. Nehebkau hired people to help train her in book keeping, trade and some combat. However, it was mostly for self-defense and security that if caught alone she wouldn't become a slave once again. She soon became an invaluable asset to his growth in Heliohapt.

Little to Nehebkau's knowledge was that one of the high priest of Heliohapt didn't take kindly to Nehebkau's growth near their temple. Now Heliohapt a free range market with special interests in Slavery and Medicinal exchange, but if a priest were to lose followers or public interest due to some teenager from merchant family, then it wouldn't set well with them. One night, this priest decided to act against Nehebkau. They sent a group of assassin to break in and eliminate Nehebkau. However what they found was nothing more than guards of Hatshepsut waiting on them. They were captured and brought to justice along with the family that sent them.

The Royal Family set out an investigation that over the next few years would investigate the affairs of the noble family that sent out the assassins. This investigation would turn up damning evidence against the high priest and their legacy leading to many more arrests and a few other low level priests families in the same conspiracies. Eventually the investigation would end and the Royal family would deliberate on their next move.

Nehebkau would be part of these discussions in the Royal Family and the dynasty of merchants known as the Hatshepsuts. They have been around for a couple hundred years and have recently expanded through marriage. Now they have have a son who caught a High priests corruption and attempt at assassination. This was someone who could become a good public figure in the future.

Its be three years since the attack on Hatshepsut's. The Royal Family made them an offer to high trade priorities and the family accepted. Nehebkau's mother, the original face of the Hatshepsut's took her position as the public figure of the family. This left Nehebkau's father to take up the family business from behind the scenes. Nehebkau had his own path and had set out to find it.

[b]Role-Play Sample:[/b]
Nehebkau walks through the market, alone, wondering what sort of weapon he should buy. Its been years since he found anything exotic enough to quench his thirst. Its always the same home smithed crap. He desired something more. Something like....like that! There it was, a beautiful kirpan. The hilt decorate with gems. The blade trimmed with a gold that flowed fluently through the entirety of its beauty. It was defiantly a blade for royalty. Yurei pulled out his gold pooch and was ready to buy when a beautiful, busty, deliciously, juicy fruit cart. He rushes over to it and hands over the gold so he can have the cart. He walks towards the slums and starts handing out food for those who need it. He gives away the cart and sticks around for a dinner offer of bread and mush.