In the Five Stages of Grief [Plot/Event/Kina/Solo for Altan]

Her mind transported, Altan was unaware of the outside world. She was no longer trapped within the Hinamoto vault, but walked towards a small gazebo floating upon a lake filled with lotus flowers. There was no battle-din here, nor the shouts of the hard-pressed challengers, only a priest chanting his soft atama soru yori kokoro wo soré.

    He stopped his chant, however, when he turned around and saw the bewildered Altan. “I shall not fight you, my dear.” He spoke loud and clear, like he was reading her mind. “I suppose it would be more accurate to say that I cannot fight you.” There was something familiar about his voice, but he did not introduce himself further. “I cannot lift a finger against you, my dear, when this place is your home-territory.” He looked upon the still lake, its waters decorated with delicate lotuses. It was a serene scene, more peaceful than anything Altan had seen before. She was alone save this one priest, stranded within an unknown place. And yet she would feel strangely like she was home again.

    As the priest spoke, another voice mingled with his own tones, like two tracks played at once. “How about you have a little rest? You have reached your final destination, my dear, so why not enjoy the fruits of your labour. It has been such a long journey, has it not?" He sounded just like the Bey clansmen, when they would tuck her into bed after a long hunt. He was so warm and reassuring, her thoughts returned to that safe place she had left behind. “There is no need to worry anymore, Altan. It is all over now.” He patted the bench, gesturing that she should sit besides him. “The sunset is quite beautiful, do you not think?”

This whole situation was confusing for Altan, not only she got transported into this strangely familiar place, but this priest's words wasn't making any sense to her at all. The redhead would step closer though, making her way to the priest to get a better look of him. "My home territory?" She would repeat those words with an raised eyebrow, "What do you mean by that?" Altan looked around the place but she knew she never visited this place before. This place wasn't within the Bey Clan area nor a part of the area they had lived as a nomad clans too. But it felt strange... why did she felt nostalgic, like she was home... although it felt different from when she was back to the Bey Clan, it felt much stronger here.

"Final destination?" The archer still couldn't comprehend the situation, but those words were enough to send a chill to her spine. The priest would keep talking, but he sounded familiar, just like those elders who was kind enough to take of her when she was a child. But those words... they had a lot of meanings and Altan kept having those voices within her head telling her to accept the reality. "...am I..." She paused for a second, trying to remember the last thing happened to her before she finally force herself to create a clearer sentence, "Am I dead...? Is this the afterlife...?"

She would then make her way to sit beside the priest as she stared to the sky. Her violet eyes would be mixed with the orange hue as she sighed. She wondered about how she was feeling at the moment... it was a roller coaster of emotions if she could say. She was anxious... then she couldn't feel anything, she felt numb... but now, she strangely felt... relieved? As if the burden on both of her shoulders had been lifted up.

"What about Lady Amida, is she safe? Is everyone safe...?" She would ask while still staring towards the sky, "And my clan, what about them..."

He listened quietly, not answering her questions, but staring at the sunset. As she looked as well, the light began dimming and cast a soft pink hue upon the lake. It was something surreal, a sight more beautiful than any sunset she had seen in her life, but the priest could tell that Altan had other concerns. “You have nothing to fear, my dear.” His voice was comforting still, reminding her of the warmth from the Bey clan’s fireplace in the winter months. “I can assure you that the ones you left behind are faring well.” He lingered upon the last two words a while, sadness coming into his voice.

    As he spoke, the light changed from pink into orange, like the last sparks of a fire. As if in response, a wispy fog came upon the surface of the lake, settling upon the delicate lotus flowers. When Altan spoke about the Bey clan, the fog seemed to react and curl about the waters, forming into vague silhouettes. If she looked closely, she could make out some familiar faces; they had the vague appearance of the men and women who had welcomed her into the Bey clan. “Your family misses you, but they understood that you had to set out one day.” The priest looked down onto the gazebo floor, something like sorrow in his eyes. “Yes, they loved you like any daughter of theirs, but you never truly belonged.” Then he looked into her eyes for the first time, showing his violet eyes just like her own. “If you could return to them, would you stay?”

    “Or would you leave again...”

Altan's eyes couldn't shift away from the sunset as she listened to the priest's calming words. Although there was a hint of sadness within her gaze as she staring longingly towards the setting sun. It was beautiful, but why did she feel like it would be her last time seeing something like that. "They are faring well... I see. That's a relief." She said, her voice was shaking, but no tears came out from her eyes yet.

As the fog began to setting in, Altan would look down, no longer looking at the sunset. There, she saw silhouettes and it didn't take her too long to recognize them... it was her family, the one who raised her. The redhead missed them, regretting that she wasn't able to even say goodbye to them...

The answer to the priest's question was not hard at all, in fact, she knew about it all along. "I would leave again." She would say without even thinking. "I felt indebted to those kind people in my whole life but... for some reason I don't feel like I ever belonged there." She would laugh sadly as she turned to face the priest. "And I admit that I have issues on myself. I don't feel I belong anywhere, the world keeps moving around but I am stuck there, trapped... chained by the obligation that I must fulfill to the point I feel like I am losing myself." A sigh escaped her lips as she smile peacefully, "I feel numb... nothing excites me anymore and it feels like I am drowning into the sea without ever reaching the bottom. But it is funny that now I feel like I am reaching the ocean floor, thus ending my journey in that dark, quiet and cold ocean."

She closed her eyes, lips was still curled into a peaceful smile as she brought her hand to touch her heart. "I have always wanted this. I want to... die and finally feel at peace."

He did not interrupt her as Altan reminisced, but met her gaze with sorrowful eyes. It was not his place to tell her what she wanted, rather he was here to fulfil that want. As she realised her wish, however, he looked away from her and into the waters. “I am sure that I need not tell you, my dear, but this wish cannot be taken back.” He moved his gaze towards the orange sunset, sighing before he continued,  “Yet I know that you want this more than anything you have ever wanted....”

    He gestured towards Altan, inviting her to look into the lake, their eyes reflecting green in the waters. In the distance, a bell rang three times, sending ripples through the lake's surface. “I must say, Altan, you are quite an amazing young woman.” He smiled slightly, as if realising that his words did not make much sense. “Ah, forgive my ramblings, it seems there is some sentimentality left in this place. I mean that you have done much with your life, my dear, more than most have done at your age. You cannot be blamed for wanting rest at such an early age, since you have taken on so many burdens. Truly, it is remarkable that you have achieved what you have.”

    He stared at the dying sunset in silence for a moment, before he turned back towards Altan. Standing up, the fog began to swirl again, spinning around the gazebo until the lake outside was obscured with white and haziness. As he offered his hand to Altan, however, the fog began dispersing and revealed a new path dug into the lake. Before her, there was a set of stone steps going from the gazebo down into the waters. It did not seem to lead anywhere; it was simply a path into the serene depths. Watching her reaction, the priest spoke again, his voice gentle and restrained, with no trace of the two conflicting voices she had heard before, “If your mind is made up - no, as your mind is made up - there is one step left.” He walked her to the gazebo’s edge, slow and steady, as if he were her one-man funeral parade.  “It will not be easy, my dear, but I have made it as easy as I can. There will be no hurtful sensation, for the body at least, you must only ensure that your mind is entirely sure. Then, and only then, will you find the ocean floor at last.” His voice, tired though it sounded, would be her final dirge, accompanying her journey into the beyond. “So when you are ready...”

    “You may leave your burdens behind.”

Altan didn't say anything, the priest gave her a warning about her wish but he already know what the fanalis really want. As soon as the priest invited her to look at the lake, she would hear the sound of a bell and ripples on the lake surface. "You are exaggerating, I haven't achieved a lot. But I think that's enough for me..." She would close her eyes for a second before opening it again, "Now I just want to rest... I came a long way."

It was interesting that a new path suddenly appeared. The redhead watched the priest, observing his every moves, listening to his words. "I am ready." She would say to the priest as she followed his lead. "I've never been more ready..."