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Thorsten new wombo

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1 Thorsten new wombo on 06/08/17, 06:33 pm

Cherry Blossom
Tier: C-Tier
Class: Assassin
Type: Offensive
Range: Medium
Requirements/Drawbacks: Thorsten, must be able to perform the cross slash.
Scaling: Hits
Sustain: 0
Cooldown: 2 Post
Cost: 20 Stamina ; 10 Sustain
Description:

    Thorsten, rushes forward in a range that’s about 4 meters dragging the hilt of his blade on the ground. If he succeeds in his rush, he cuts both vertical than horizontal at them using a blade for two individual D-tier cuts, from the ground or the air depending if he jumps. Totaling C-tier damage.


Autumn Breeze
Tier: C-Tier
Class: Assassin
Type: Offensive
Range: Close
Requirements/Drawbacks: Thorsten, must be able slice vertical after the somersault.
Scaling: Hits
Sustain: 0
Cooldown: 2 Post
Cost: 20 Stamina ; 10 Sustain
Description:

    Thorsten, performs a single, graceful looking somersault over his opponent to get behind. If he isn’t stopped, or trips, he draws forth his blade, slicing vertically to deal C-tier damage to his opponent(s) shoulders aiming to land a deep cut.


Falling Leaves
Tier: C-Tier
Class: Assassin
Type: Offensive/Supplementary
Range: Medium
Requirements/Drawbacks: Thorsten, must throw his arm in a windmill like motion.
Scaling: Hits
Sustain: 0
Cooldown: 2 Post
Cost: 20 Stamina ; 10 Sustain
Description:

    Thorsten, takes two throwing spikes from their pouches. From a distance of 5 meters at any angle including airborne, he throws two throwing spikes at his opponent's neck, sternum, and knees. If they hit, the other person gains a minor slow (If hit in the knees) unless they block the incoming projectiles, or pull them out. Causing D-tier bleeding.


Sunlit Blessing
Tier: B-Tier
Class: Assassin
Type: Supplementary
Range: Close
Requirements/Drawbacks: Thorsten, must be in arm's reach of the other person.
Scaling: Duration
Sustain: 0
Cooldown: 3 Post
Cost: 30 Stamina ; 15 Sustain
Description:

    Thorsten, using his index and middle finger. he charges his left hand into his opponent's chest. If he able to stab into their chest, Thorsten deals B-tier damage from penetrating the skin.



Last edited by Thorsten Ove on 10/08/17, 10:08 am; edited 7 times in total


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2 Re: Thorsten new wombo on 06/08/17, 09:35 pm

Rima Fahim

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Cherry Blossom - You’re not gonna be able to knock someone up, AND deal C-Tier damage in a single ability. I’d recommend making a single ability to knock someone into the air, then create a normal ability to follow up with. Oh, and make sure you don’t specify “Byakuren”, because that’s gonna restrict your weapon choice for this ability hardcore.

Autumn Breeze - This should be fine, I think?

Falling Leaves - You’re not gonna be able to get C-Tier (Average-Level) bleeding AND blood clotting on a single C-Tier ability. You can however, get a weaker (d-tier) level bleeding, and blood clotting. Also, you’ll need to specify that the blood clotting is only in the limb that’s struck.

Sunlit Blessing - This is simply too much for a C-Tier ability. To place someone in a “near dead state” would need to at LEAST be B-Tier, if we allow it at all. To do that and the c-tier blood loss, that’d most likely be A-Tier. XD


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3 Re: Thorsten new wombo on 06/08/17, 11:01 pm

Edited


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4 Re: Thorsten new wombo on 07/08/17, 02:28 am

Rima Fahim

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Cherry Blossom - This is still having two kind of effects in a single ability, while keeping the full damage on it. How exactly are you creating this smokescreen? By using dirt or something? If you want to "create a smokescreen", while also keeping a bit of damage at this tier, you're gonna need to reduce the damage to D-Tier.

Autumn Breeze - I would recommend removing "Byakuren" from the text, since you'd be limiting yourself on the weapon that can be used.

Falling Leaves - Instead of wording this as "d-tier bleeding", I'd simply put "minor bleeding" instead. Since there aren't any official tiers of status effects like that.

Sunlit Blessing - Just curious, but why exactly would this immobilize them?


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5 Re: Thorsten new wombo on 07/08/17, 02:41 am

Edited


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6 Re: Thorsten new wombo on 07/08/17, 02:41 pm

Cherry Blossom

  • Scaling: I'm going to help you out and say it will be useless to scale this with damage. You have and will have (in the future) stronger weapons that will up the damage without the cost of stamina. I would suggest "Hits" scaling.
  • Description: Remove "katana" and replace it with "sword" or "blade". You're unintentionally screwing yourself over if you want to use this ability with a different bladed weapon in the future.
  • You're also trying to do way too much in this for a C Tier ability. You have a D Tier smokescreen, then two D Tier slashes. It is not logical to slice twice at the same time unless you're duel wielding. Either way, it will still count as two individual slashes.

Autumn Breeze

  • Scaling: I'm going to help you out and say it will be useless to scale this with damage. You have and will have (in the future) stronger weapons that will up the damage without the cost of stamina. I would suggest "Hits" scaling. Anything that doesn't use a weapon that does damage would be generally good for "Damage" scaling.
  • Description: I don't really understand the wording of this ability. Are you flipping 5 meters towards / behind the opponent and then slashing? The way you have it written now is that you somersault and then somehow slash 5 meters in front of you.
  • I will tell you right now that you can't "run through" anyone. We are an anime site but that's a bit ridiculous in our universe. Plus, C Tier damage in a base form isn't enough to cut through anything. It's deep cuts. B Tier is where you get to cutting through things.

Falling Leaves

  • Type: This would be Offensive / Supplementary the way you currently have it.
  • Scaling: I'm going to help you out and say it will be useless to scale this with damage. You have and will have (in the future) stronger weapons that will up the damage without the cost of stamina. I would suggest "Hits" scaling.
  • Description: You can not have four projectiles in a C Tier ability. You are limited to two. You also need to choose whether you want the D Tier damage or the blood clotting. There should also be an explanation WHY it causes blood clotting. Is it poison? Or what?

Sunlit Blessing

  • Range: This would be a "Close" range ability.
  • Description: First of all, you aren't allowed to stab through someone's chest with C Tier damage. In combat, since you have natural B Tier damage, you would be able to but not in the ability description.
  • You may not have a full immobilization in a C Tier ability. Not sure what you're going to want to do with this ability but I suggest making it a higher tier or putting it aside for now.


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7 Re: Thorsten new wombo on 07/08/17, 03:32 pm

edit


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8 Re: Thorsten new wombo on 07/08/17, 05:56 pm

Rima Fahim

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Cherry Blossom - We’ve already talked about the whole dragging your blade across the ground. You can have it as a sort of flavor text, but you need to make sure you know it is ONLY flavor text. This won’t be creating the smokescreen like you originally wanted to. Also, what do you mean by “wishlist they can or can’t see”? XD

I suppose I should also ask, how do you intend on cutting both vertically and horizontally simultaneously? That sounds like something you’d need two swords to do.

Autumn Breeze - I think this one is fine, unless Diana has more to say about it. I couldn’t find anything you didn’t directly fix/explain better in her previous grading.

Falling Leaves - This still says you’re throwing four throwing spikes, I’m assuming it was just something you missed. ^^

Sunlit Blessing - I think this the concept is fine now, since it’s B-Tier. However, what do you mean by “for two blood loss happens”? Oh, and you don’t need to state that Thorsten is able to use it on himself, because you can technically use ANY move on yourself. Just as you could irl.


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9 Re: Thorsten new wombo on 07/08/17, 11:34 pm

Edit


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10 Re: Thorsten new wombo on 09/08/17, 03:49 pm

Rima Fahim

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Cherry Blossom - Again, this might just be me being picky. However, I feel like it's best if you state that the individual slashes do D-Tier damage. Otherwise, people might try to tell you that you missed the combined C-Tier damage if you miss. PS : You didn't have to actually write "flavor text" in the description. LMFAO

Autumn Breeze - I think this should be fine.

Falling Leaves - Curious, what do you mean by "the other person is impaired"? Because as of right now, all I see is a form of D-Tier bleeding on a C-Tier ability.

Sunlit Blessing - I'd personally remove the last portion, the whole "for two post blood loss happens", because if someone is wounded like that, of course they would start bleeding. Bleeding dealt like that wouldn't exactly have a post duration either, I mean you're stabbing into their CHEST. XD


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11 Re: Thorsten new wombo on 09/08/17, 11:34 pm

edited


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12 Re: Thorsten new wombo on 10/08/17, 09:57 am

Rima Fahim

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I think this will be the last thing you need to fix, sorry for it taking so long!

Falling Leaves - I'd recommend changing the "impaired" part of this ability to a form of minor slow, if they hit the enemies knees. For a C-Tier ability like this, you're not gonna be able to have a full-on stun/impair like that. Especially when paired up with a bleeding effect. ^^


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13 Re: Thorsten new wombo on 10/08/17, 10:12 am

edited


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14 Re: Thorsten new wombo on 10/08/17, 11:19 pm

Rima Fahim

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I think we're good to go now. Approved for training!

Code:
[center][b]Cherry Blossom[/b][/center]
[b]Tier:[/b] C-Tier
[b]Class:[/b] Assassin
[b]Type:[/b] Offensive
[b]Range:[/b] Medium
[b]Requirements/Drawbacks:[/b] Thorsten, must be able to perform the cross slash.
[b]Scaling:[/b] Hits
[b]Sustain:[/b] 0
[b]Cooldown:[/b] 2 Post
[b]Cost:[/b] 20 Stamina ; 10 Sustain
[b]Description:[/b]
[list]
Thorsten, rushes forward in a range that’s about 4 meters dragging the hilt of his blade on the ground. If he succeeds in his rush, he cuts both vertical than horizontal at them using a blade for two individual D-tier cuts, from the ground or the air depending if he jumps. Totaling C-tier damage. [/list]

[center][b]Autumn Breeze[/b][/center]
[b]Tier:[/b] C-Tier
[b]Class:[/b] Assassin
[b]Type:[/b] Offensive
[b]Range:[/b] Close
[b]Requirements/Drawbacks:[/b] Thorsten, must be able slice vertical after the somersault.
[b]Scaling:[/b] Hits
[b]Sustain:[/b] 0
[b]Cooldown:[/b] 2 Post
[b]Cost:[/b] 20 Stamina ; 10 Sustain
[b]Description:[/b]
[list]
Thorsten, performs a single, graceful looking somersault over his opponent to get behind. If he isn’t stopped, or trips, he draws forth his blade, slicing vertically to deal C-tier damage to his opponent(s) shoulders aiming to land a deep cut. [/list]

[center][b]Falling Leaves [/b][/center]
[b]Tier:[/b] C-Tier
[b]Class:[/b] Assassin
[b]Type:[/b] Offensive/Supplementary
[b]Range:[/b] Medium
[b]Requirements/Drawbacks:[/b] Thorsten, must throw his arm in a windmill like motion.
[b]Scaling:[/b] Hits
[b]Sustain:[/b] 0
[b]Cooldown:[/b] 2 Post
[b]Cost:[/b] 20 Stamina ; 10 Sustain
[b]Description:[/b]
[list]
Thorsten, takes two throwing spikes from their pouches. From a distance of 5 meters at any angle including airborne, he throws two throwing spikes at his opponent's neck, sternum, and knees. If they hit, the other person gains a minor slow (If hit in the knees) unless they block the incoming projectiles, or pull them out. Causing D-tier bleeding. [/list]

[center][b]Sunlit Blessing[/b][/center]
[b]Tier:[/b] B-Tier
[b]Class:[/b] Assassin
[b]Type:[/b] Supplementary
[b]Range:[/b] Close
[b]Requirements/Drawbacks:[/b] Thorsten, must be in arm's reach of the other person.
[b]Scaling:[/b] Duration
[b]Sustain:[/b] 0
[b]Cooldown:[/b] 3 Post
[b]Cost:[/b] 30 Stamina ; 15 Sustain
[b]Description:[/b]
[list]
Thorsten, using his index and middle finger. he charges his left hand into his opponent's chest. If he able to stab into their chest, Thorsten deals B-tier damage from penetrating the skin. [/list]


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Shards of Solomon: x2
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