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Cherilyn's Gaia Life Starters

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1 Cherilyn's Gaia Life Starters on 18/03/17, 03:41 am

Cherilyn

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C-Tier
C-Tier
Flashing Sakura Dance
Tier: C
Class: Magician
Type: Offensive
Range: Long-Range
Requirements/Drawbacks: User will raise their staff/wand to the sky and sing a melodic tone, summoning the petals.
Scaling: 
Damage
Sustain: 0
Cool Down: 2 Posts
Cost: 20 Magoi | 15 Magoi
Description:


    Two beautiful Cherry Blossom petals appear from the extent of her magoi being dispersed, as she holds her staff towards the sky, singing in a melodic tone; similar to an angel. Her body will begin to glow as the blossoms spin around her quicker before being dispersed at her foes with the point of her staff. The size of the petals can be compared to actual Cherry Blossom Petals around five centimeters (5) all around, but however, these petals are sharp and can cause two separate cuts. Each petal deals D-tier damage but together dealing C-tier Damage all-together. They can travel up to fifteen meters before vanishing. Life Magic.


Cracking Earth
Tier: D
Class: Magician
Type: Offensive
Range: Medium
Requirements/Drawbacks: Staff must be slammed into the ground.
Scaling: Damage
Sustain: 0
Cool Down: 1 Post
Cost: 10 Magoi | 5 Magoi
Description:


    As Cherilyn slams her staff into the ground a huge thorn formed by her magoi takes shape underground as it bolts from the ground below her enemies. The thorn can strike anyone within a seven-meter radius of Cherilyn. For half a second rumbling can be heard beneath the foe before the thorn rises to strike her foe. The thorn tilts outwards with a rounded tip, not able to piece the enemy but however causing bruises and as well as launching her, foe a few feet into the air. The thorn/spike circular base is a meter (1) wide which descends into a third of a meter (1/3) at the tip. It deals D-tier damage. Life Magic.


Gliding Vine
Tier: D
Class: Magician
Type: Offensive
Range: Medium
Requirements/Drawbacks: Cherilyn must tap her staff against the ground.
Scaling: Range
Sustain: 0
Cool Down: 1 Post
Cost: 10 Magoi | 5 Magoi
Description:

    Upon tapping her staff against the ground a vine is formed by her magoi, this vine, however, is special, though it may appear to be just wrapped around the length of her staff's handle it can stretch out to whip her foes, acting as of course a whip. The vine can be stretched out to five meters (5) extending from her staff and it's a seventh of a meter (1/7) wide.  It deals D-tier damage. Life Magic.


Gaia's Storm
Tier: D
Class: Magician
Type: Offensive
Range: Long
Requirements/Drawbacks: Cherilyn must begin waving the staff and conjuring up vines. 
Scaling: Range
Sustain: 0
Cool Down: 1 Post
Cost: 10 Magoi | 5 Magoi
Description:

    As Cherilyn waves, her staff vines will begin to conjure out of the ground, due to the extent of her magoi being dispersed. These vines are sixty centimeters (60) long and about thirty centimeters (30) wide, however, in just half a second, she has conjured up enough vines to form a super-sized vine. This vine which is pointing out of the ground is three meters around/thick and can extend out to ten meters, the vine will go underground and above ground three times before smashing into her foe. This deals D-tier damage. Life magic.


Aromarus Flower: Defense
Tier: D
Class: Magician
Type: Supplementary
Range: Long
Requirements/Drawbacks: Cherilyn must point her staff forward and channel her magoi forward.
Scaling: Defense
Sustain: 0
Cool Down: 1 Post
Cost: 10 Magoi | 5 Magoi
Description:

    As Cherilyn points her staff outwards which will begin to emit a green light. In a flash a massive flower will appear, each time this ability is used the flower's color theme is different. The petals are bent backward to shelter Cherilyn in a dome, the flower's stem is missing but the size of the flower is three meters all around. The petals that shield her creating a dome are a meter thick and two meters long. This can take D-tier damage. Life magic.



Last edited by Cherilyn on 19/03/17, 03:04 am; edited 6 times in total


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2 Re: Cherilyn's Gaia Life Starters on 19/03/17, 12:29 am

Rima Fahim

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Flashing Sakura Dance - You forgot to bold your Requirements/Drawbacks, oh and you should most likely add some form of physical motion you do with your staff to this instead of just standing still. Instead of saying “Instead of two projectiles this now has five projectiles”, please just say “Hits” or “Projectiles”. The costs should be 20 Magoi | 15 Magoi.

Cracking Earth - You need a form of scaling on this ability. This might just be me being slightly picky, but could you possibly try to reword this? I’m having a bit of trouble fully understanding what this is supposed to do, but I’m assuming you’re trying to like summon forth a thorny spike from under your foe? If so, please try to make that a bit more evident, sorry u.u Oh and make sure to state that it deals D-Tier damage.

Gliding Vine - You need a form of scaling on this ability. The vine is one meter wide? That’s one fat vine o-o, perhaps you meant long? Also, please state that it does D-Tier damage.

Gaia Whip - You need a form of scaling on this ability. What exactly is this ability supposed to do? Is it some sort of vine whip that you can strike enemies with? If so, then right now it just sort of sounds like it’s a random vine that wraps itself around your staff.

Aroma Aroma - You need a form of scaling on this ability. I’ll be honest with you, this ability doesn’t really seem like it would have very many purposes. I won’t discourage you from making it though, as there are only a few actual issues with it. The flower itself will disappear if you don’t sustain it, so you should get replace the part where it says “The only way to end the spell is for it to be dispelled or the flower destroyed.” with “this flower will last for 1 post” or something along those lines. (Ps, you make this ability scale with posts, so you could just keep amping up the amount of posts it can last. ^^)


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3 Re: Cherilyn's Gaia Life Starters on 19/03/17, 02:35 am

Cherilyn

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C-Tier
C-Tier
Bumped.


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4 Re: Cherilyn's Gaia Life Starters on 19/03/17, 02:48 am

Flashing Sakura Dance

  • The petals will deal D-Tier damage separately.

  • Please make the distance they can travel 15 meters.


Gaia's Storm

  • Is there a point to going underground three times or is it just for show? If that's the case, I'd remove it.

  • Also, you have the range short, yet it can reach 10 meters? Do you mean the range which it can be conjured? If I'm understanding the ability correctly, that would make the range Close.


Aromarus Flower: Defense

  • Generally defensive abilities like these can only take up to damage equal to their tier without any scaling.

  • I'd recommend the scaling increase the tier which the flower can defend Cherilyn from.


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5 Re: Cherilyn's Gaia Life Starters on 19/03/17, 02:54 am

Cherilyn

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C-Tier
Bumped, was discussing the issues with Rima in private on discord~


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6 Re: Cherilyn's Gaia Life Starters on 19/03/17, 03:09 am

Approved~

Code:
[center][b]Flashing Sakura Dance[/b][/center]
[size=12][b]Tier:[/b] C[/size]
[size=12][b]Class:[/b] Magician[/size]
[size=12][b]Type:[/b] Offensive[/size]
[size=12][b]Range:[/b] Long-Range[/size]
[size=12][b]Requirements/Drawbacks:[/b] User will raise their staff/wand to the sky and sing a melodic tone, summoning the petals.
[b]Scaling: [/b][/size][size=12]Damage[/size]
[size=12][b]Sustain:[/b] 0
[b]Cool Down:[/b] 2 Posts
[b]Cost:[/b] 20 Magoi | 15 Magoi
[b]Description:[/b]
[/size]
[list]
Two beautiful Cherry Blossom petals appear from the extent of her magoi being dispersed, as she holds her staff towards the sky, singing in a melodic tone; similar to an angel. Her body will begin to glow as the blossoms spin around her quicker before being dispersed at her foes with the point of her staff. The size of the petals can be compared to actual Cherry Blossom Petals around five centimeters (5) all around, but however, these petals are sharp and can cause two separate cuts. Each petal deals D-tier damage but together dealing C-tier Damage all-together. They can travel up to fifteen meters before vanishing. Life Magic.[/list]

[center][b]Cracking Earth[/b][/center]
[size=12][b]Tier:[/b] D
[b]Class:[/b] Magician
[b]Type:[/b] Offensive
[b]Range:[/b] Medium
[b]Requirements/Drawbacks:[/b] Staff must be slammed into the ground.
[b]Scaling:[/b] Damage
[b]Sustain:[/b] 0
[b]Cool Down:[/b] 1 Post
[b]Cost:[/b] 10 Magoi | 5 Magoi
[b]Description:[/b]
[/size]
[list]
As Cherilyn slams her staff into the ground a huge thorn formed by her magoi takes shape underground as it bolts from the ground below her enemies. The thorn can strike anyone within a seven-meter radius of Cherilyn. For half a second rumbling can be heard beneath the foe before the thorn rises to strike her foe. The thorn tilts outwards with a rounded tip, not able to piece the enemy but however causing bruises and as well as launching her, foe a few feet into the air. The thorn/spike circular base is a meter (1) wide which descends into a third of a meter (1/3) at the tip. It deals D-tier damage. Life Magic.[/list]

[center][b]Gliding Vine[/b][/center]
[b][size=12]Tier:[/size][/b][size=12] D[/size]
[b][size=12]Class:[/size][/b][size=12] Magician[/size]
[b][size=12]Type:[/size][/b][size=12] Offensive[/size]
[b][size=12]Range:[/size][/b][size=12] Medium[/size]
[b][size=12]Requirements/Drawbacks:[/size][/b][size=12] Cherilyn must tap her staff against the ground.[/size]
[b][size=12]Scaling:[/size][/b][size=12] Range[/size]
[b][size=12]Sustain:[/size][/b][size=12] 0[/size]
[b][size=12]Cool Down:[/size][/b][size=12] 1 Post[/size]
[b][size=12]Cost:[/size][/b][size=12] 10 Magoi | 5 Magoi[/size]
[b][size=12]Description:[/size][/b]
[list]
Upon tapping her staff against the ground a vine is formed by her magoi, this vine, however, is special, though it may appear to be just wrapped around the length of her staff's handle it can stretch out to whip her foes, acting as of course a whip. The vine can be stretched out to five meters (5) extending from her staff and it's a seventh of a meter (1/7) wide.  It deals D-tier damage. Life Magic.[/list]

[center][b]Gaia's Storm[/b][/center]
[b][size=12]Tier:[/size][/b][size=12] D[/size]
[b][size=12]Class:[/size][/b][size=12] Magician[/size]
[b][size=12]Type:[/size][/b][size=12] Offensive[/size]
[b][size=12]Range:[/size][/b][size=12] Long[/size]
[b][size=12]Requirements/Drawbacks:[/size][/b][size=12] Cherilyn must begin waving the staff and conjuring up vines. [/size]
[b][size=12]Scaling:[/size][/b][size=12] Range[/size]
[b][size=12]Sustain:[/size][/b][size=12] 0[/size]
[b][size=12]Cool Down:[/size][/b][size=12] 1 Post[/size]
[b][size=12]Cost:[/size][/b][size=12] 10 Magoi | 5 Magoi[/size]
[b][size=12]Description:[/size][/b]
[list]
As Cherilyn waves, her staff vines will begin to conjure out of the ground, due to the extent of her magoi being dispersed. These vines are sixty centimeters (60) long and about thirty centimeters (30) wide, however, in just half a second, she has conjured up enough vines to form a super-sized vine. This vine which is pointing out of the ground is three meters around/thick and can extend out to ten meters, the vine will go underground and above ground three times before smashing into her foe. This deals D-tier damage. Life magic.[/list]

[center][b]Aromarus Flower: Defense[/b][/center]
[b][size=12]Tier:[/size][/b][size=12] D[/size]
[b][size=12]Class:[/size][/b][size=12] Magician[/size]
[b][size=12]Type:[/size][/b][size=12] Supplementary[/size]
[b][size=12]Range:[/size][/b][size=12] Long[/size]
[b][size=12]Requirements/Drawbacks:[/size][/b][size=12] Cherilyn must point her staff forward and channel her magoi forward.[/size]
[b][size=12]Scaling:[/size][/b][size=12] Defense[/size]
[b][size=12]Sustain:[/size][/b][size=12] 0[/size]
[b][size=12]Cool Down:[/size][/b][size=12] 1 Post[/size]
[b][size=12]Cost:[/size][/b][size=12] 10 Magoi | 5 Magoi[/size]
[b][size=12]Description:[/size][/b]
[list]
As Cherilyn points her staff outwards which will begin to emit a green light. In a flash a massive flower will appear, each time this ability is used the flower's color theme is different. The petals are bent backward to shelter Cherilyn in a dome, the flower's stem is missing but the size of the flower is three meters all around. The petals that shield her creating a dome are a meter thick and two meters long. This can take D-tier damage. Life magic.[/list]


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